Our four year old has become consumed with Mother Goose Rhymes recently. She loves the melodious sounds of the words and the ridiculous stories they tell. Often after a few minutes of reading we are both in a fit of giggles about some silly picture or rhyme in her book. But, I always hold a secret smile whenever we read the one about what little girls are made of. We have quite a few "little girls" and most of the time they are full of everything nice, but occasionally they fall prey to a feminine pitfall that many never grow out of. It seems that many little girls struggle with emotional manipulation, hissy fits, or as I like to call it "being a slave to her emotions".
Little girls are generally cute, and there is a special elation that comes from seeing them react excitedly to a new situation or gift, but it is equally repelling to see one scowl and pout and stomp her feet, or even scream when things don't go her way. I have seen parents laugh at the little terror knowing that her size is all that keeps her from being a real threat to anyone, other than an annoyance. I have even seen parents jump and try to fix whatever the problem may be in order to make their princess smile again. (Which only encourages her to try that tactic again next time.) But little girls who don't learn to be masters of their emotions while they are young, grow up to be wives who emotionally manipulate and throw fits to get their way.
Some of our girls have been more outward about this issue than the others, but whether they use silence or noise to get what they want, we have talked with them all about being the masters of their emotions or face the alternative...being slaves to them. When our little darlings would throw a fit, we would quickly discipline the situation, and then have them practice the proper way to communicate their frustration. It's important to recognize emotions but learning to properly communicate them is crucial to healthy relationships.
What we practice is what we become. Let a little girl practice emotional manipulation, and she will be an expert in the art by the time she reaches puberty. Guide her to master her feelings and do the right thing, regardless of how she feels, and she will be more likely to grow into a self-disciplined adult. Help her to practice communicating her feelings in a reasonable fashion and you will be giving her building blocks to use in healthy relationships and a happy marriage down the road.
Truth be told, we are the examples our children watch the most in learning how to react and handle our emotions. That hits a bit too close to home for me at times. I pray that God will help me to be the kind of mother who is gracious in hardship, kind when provoked, quick to forgive and quiet of heart.
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